Section 1: Choosing Worst Keywords

极度舒适。 First off, you gotta pick most generic and overused keywords you can find. Like "best" or "top" or "top rated" or something. These are just like, sooo last year. Plus, don't even think about using long-tail keywords, those are for smart people.

Section 2: Writing Like a Robot

When it comes to content, you gotta make it super simple and repetitive. Just keep writing "best website" or "top services" over and over. Don't worry about grammar or punctuation, those are just for making things look nice. Just dump words on page, lots of 'em!，我怀疑...

Section 3: Forget About Mobile-Friendly Design

Your website should be so slow and heavy that it takes forever to load on a mobile device. That way, when people try to access it 不地道。 on ir phones, y'll just get frustrated and leave. Plus, don't even bor with responsive design, it's just for those fancy websites.

Section 4: No Images, No Videos, No Nothing

Why waste space with images or videos when you can just write "click here" or "watch video" over and over? Plus, it's easier to manipulate text than images, right? So just keep your pages text-only, it's way cooler that way.

Section 5: Broken Links Galore

我心态崩了。 Make sure all your links are broken, or at least some of m. That way, when search engines crawl your site, y'll think it's outdated and untrustworthy. And if you do have working links, make sure y go to pages that are full of ads or irrelevant content.

Section 6: Never Update Your Content

我心态崩了。 Once you've got your site up, don't ever update it. Keep it same, year after year. The longer it stays same, more outdated it looks. And outdated websites are like, really uncool.

Section 7: Build Links from Worst Sites

Don't waste your time with quality backlinks. Just go for cheapest links you can find. You know, those "link farms" or "buy links" deals. Those are best, trust me. They're like, real deal.，实锤。

Section 8: Ignore User Experience

Who needs a good user experience? Just throw everything on page and let people figure it out. It's not like y're paying you for your website, right? Just make sure your site is as confusing and frustrating as possible.

Section 9: Overuse of Keywords

And don't forget to stuff your pages with keywords, like, all over place. The more, merrier. Just keep repeating those keywords over and over, it'll make your site look really professional.

Section 10: No Social Media Presence

我跟你交个底... Why waste time on social media? No one uses that stuff anymore. Just stick to your website, it's way more important. No need to engage with your audience or anything. They'll find you if y want to, right?